A Hemiola of the Mind

Author’s Note: As I finished the novella, Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde by Robert Stevenson, I was amazed by the constant struggle within Jekyll’s mind as he fought between good and evil. He discovered, “With every day, and from both sides of my intelligence, the moral and the intellectual, I thus drew steadily nearer to that truth, by whose partial discovery I have been doomed to such a dreadful shipwreck: that man is not truly one, but truly two” (104). I was intrigued by the motif of duality, and how each of us has two sides. I believe that although we all have both evil and good inside of us, we also have a choice between which personality we choose to pursue. I was also inspired by the quote, “Terror woke up in my breast as sudden and startling as the crash of cymbals” (112), because I love music analogies. I decided to write a piece in the view of Jekyll but to use music as a symbol of the struggle that goes on in his mind. (The word “hemiola”, which I used below, is the contrast between 2 and 3 in music).

I hear sounds in my ears; some may call these extraordinary auditory creations by the simple name of “thoughts”, but I believe that to be too stringent of a name. I like to believe that my mind is not a mechanical machine operating on austere instructions, but rather an orchestra – where every “thought” is an intricately woven symphony: coquetry comprised of crescendos and swells. For most, this majestic music moves methodically throughout the soul – the major chords always flow smoothly over the crunchy, weak minor chords. I, however, am more perceptive to this underlying bitterness of sound and it is impossible to erase it from my mind.

This orchestra plays emulously to the other, mocking rhythms and dynamics, but failing to copy the grand tone of the previous song. The sound that projects from the fingertips of these musicians rings odiously through the ears of a passels of citizens, scratching the eardrum with its callous tenor and striking pitch, but I take pleasure in this fresh and strange music. It encompasses a completely different sound than has ever pounded in my ears before – it is distinctive, it is sinister.

After I first noticed this malicious melody, I began to listen for it eagerly and block out the other, more monotonous band, opening my ears only for the menacing pulse of tedious trombones and booming bass drums. I craved, still crave, the music of the latter, but the first and second orchestras did not cope well with the thought of sharing the stage of my mind. They fight furiously against one another, increasing tempos and changing piano to forte – creating an immense hemiola that pounds through my head with unimaginable pain. There is not enough room for two conductors in my soul – it has become apparent that I must choose between one or the other. But now that the malevolent orchestra has increased their volume, I no longer have control over which music I wish to reverberate through my ears. As the musicians continue to attempt to outplay each other, the harmonies that once provided me with joy and bliss now split my ears and mind to pieces. All too ready for the quiet of peace and clarity, I decide to end the clashing concert. With a swift flick of my wrist, I cut off the band, and for the first time in years, I breathe in the silence of serenity.